Remember when you were a kid and you had a friend your parents weren’t so fond of? I remember getting frustrated when my parents would share the advice of “you become who you surround yourself with” because I wasn’t able to fully understand the influence. As an adult though, I completely understand. It is very common to read articles or quotes from others who have been successful in careers or with certain periods of life who have shared advice to “surround yourself with those who lift you up”, There is no secret to why. We are social beings, at the end of the day we all just want to be accepted and liked.
So, when it comes to focusing on a goal that not everyone around you may have, it is no surprise that many people are unsuccessful at achieving it when some of our social influencers may not be on the same path, unsupportive in our efforts, or even trying to sabotage our success.
In my time as a coach, I almost always have had to support clients to overcome the social influences, and have even dealt with it myself when making my own health choices. It can be challenging, frustrating, and even isolating when you are going against the “norm” when it comes to nutrition, especially if you don’t have an outlet or support system available. You may not be able to get everyone to understand what you are doing or why it is important to you, that’s okay. Your goal isn’t about them, it is about you. These are some of the things I have found to be most successful in supporting my clients to their goals:
- Find a tribe. Whether it is a group class at your gym, a friend from work, your spouse, or even a coach. Having a tribe of people behind you who know what you are focused on, can be a “go-to” when you are having challenges, and can support and lift you up is what we all need (even if we aren’t focused on a health goal).
- And say “BYE FELICIA” to those who are unsupportive. Keep in mind that those who have negative things to say about what you are focused on or even try to influence you away from your goal have their own insecurities to deal with. It has nothing to do with you. You can explain the importance of your goal, and if they are not on board in supporting you then maybe it is time to have some space. Be confident in your choices, you are doing this for YOU and you more than deserve to be at your goal.
- Get the right advice. First, kudos to you for seeking advice and support to your goal. But, for the love of God, PLEASE stop asking your facebook groups for nutrition advice, supplement suggestions, and even diet advice. Your health and body is individual, not a cookie cutter program. There are many factors taken into consideration from a health professional when giving supplement suggestions, nutrition advice, and programming. Would you fix a car based off the tips provided from someone with no experience in the matter? Seek out a professional and invest in yourself, those who do achieve the most success, and longer lasting results. If cost is an issue, there are many options available to those on a budget, you may be surprised to find that support isn’t always the heavy price tag you have in your mind. Lastly, a health professionals goal is to educate you and give you the tools to be able to maintain better health on your own, knowing WHY you are doing what you are doing is one of the best tools you can have and is something no cookie cutter program or local mom (despite their best intentions) is going to be able to give you.
- Share your goal and successes! As hard as it may be, sharing your goal whether to the social media world or those close to you and really “putting it out there” will give you the most accountability to it. Even more, as you start to see success you never know who you may be inspiring! Sharing what you are accomplishing can influence others that they can do it too, and in return give you more push to keep going when things get tough.
As we enter 2019, take a step back and evaluate your social influences. Are they bringing you closer or further from your goals? What do you need to get the support you’re seeking? Find your tribe, get the right advice, share your story, and most importantly…BE CONFIDENT in yourself and your choices. You more than deserve the successes you are seeking. You more than deserve to be happy with yourself and feel like YOU again.
I would love to be here and support you, too. If you are seeking someone for accountability or guidance, connect with me here and we can decide if we are a good fit to work together!
You’ve got this, girl.